This kid missing a “One Million Dollar Shot” is the most depressing thing ever


Back in 1995, Foot Locker must have been absolutely rolling in cash and they decided to give one lucky fan a chance at a “One Million Dollar Shot” during halftime of the NBA Rookie Game in Phoenix. All he had to do was make a three-pointer. Not even from half court or anything. Anywhere on the court. One chance. If he made it, $1 million. TNT broadcasted it. Cameras were everywhere. The crowd was on it’s feet. Eric Montross was there. The place was lit.

The lucky fan was some kid named Mike Hoban. Based on the haircut, Mike Hoban was possibly the perfect ’90s kid. This was the type of kid who was on Legends of the Hidden Temple or GUTS. He ate Reese’s Puffs cereal. He wore BK Nights. He may have even went to Space Camp. You were rooting for Mike Hoban to just drain this.

Hoban had apparently been practicing his shot all week and even had some training sessions with former Phoenix Suns great Dan Majerle. Dan “Thunder” Majerle! No way he could f***** miss now.

After a couple minutes practicing his robotic shooting form and basking in the fact that in a minute or two he could be a millionaire, Hoban stepped to the top of the key with the ball. Foot locker jersey, short shorts, looking so ’90s. Dude’s heart must have been beating out of his chest. Hoban took the ball and let it go. The shot was on line, but fell woefully short of the rim. Hopes and dreams shattered as Hoban was nearly in tears being consoled by Thunder Dan and his family, including his dad who apparently is Al from “Tool Time.”

Then for the post-shot interview with the late Craig Sager as Hoban tries to make sense of what just happened. He says he could have concentrated more and wishes that he could have one more shot.

“I should’ve made it.” – Mike Hoban

Had I missed a three for $1 million, I probably would’ve offed myself. I’d be reliving that shot in my head for the rest of my life, turning around and looking for Dan Majerle to console me but he wouldn’t be there. I really hope that Mike Hoban had more courage than that and was able to overcome his airball for $1 million. If there’s anything we can learn from Mike Hoban’s experience, it is that no matter what, in any situation ever — even if there’s a fire — you should always hit the rim because that makes missing look so much better.


About Author

Divac is the Editor-In Chief of The Schmozone and founder of He is a fantasy sports maniac with terrible gambling habits and has a strange, irrational obsession with everything that is NBA legend Vlade Divac. Divac will be posting his outrageous commentary on daily sports topics in "The Daily Flop" section and one day dreams of being re-born as a mediocre Eastern European NBA journeyman.