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Divac’s Thursday Night Football Flop – Cardinals @ 49ers

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Divac’s Thursday Night Football Flop, some quick thoughts on what is generally the shi**est game on primetime television unless the Rams and 49ers are playing on Monday Night for some reason.

Thursday Night Football was invented for Blaine Gabbert v. Drew Stanton. Couldn’t draw it up any better. This is the Ali-Frazier of Thursday Night Football quarterback duels. The seven people who aren’t Cardinals or 49ers fans that decide to watch this game for “fantasy purposes” will just sit there in awe at how terrible this will be.

Now, Blaine Gabbert is going to be involved in a lot of straight trash QB match-ups because you’ve already got one side of the match-up covered. Keenum v. Gabbert was bad. Like, “I’d rather have my eyes gouged out with a screwdriver than watch this” bad. Any QB match-up in which Blaine Gabbert is even arguably the best QB is a dumpster fire. This was a guy that the Jaguars said to, “you know, I just don’t think you’re good enough to play quarterback for our team.” The Jaguars! They’ve won like six games since 2012! The NFL is legitimately trying to relocate them to London by having them play half their games there.

This one — Gabbert v. Stanton — is unparalleled though. If there’s a worse QB match-up this season, the game should just be canceled. Noodle-arm Carson Palmer got concussed Sunday, presumably thinking about all of the interceptions he has thrown this season, and that means Drew Stanton is taking the reins on the road in San Francisco AS A FAVORITE. Drew Stanton, a road f***** favorite.

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Yup, that Drew Stanton. Where are we at in society today? This game has 10-6 written all over it.

Mainly due to Carson Palmer’s penchant to get hurt every other year, the Cardinals seem to have a garbage starting quarterback more than any other semi-respectable team in the NFL. Usually that garbage starting quarterback is Drew Stanton, but remember when Ryan Lindley started a playoff game for them? How funny was that? 16 of 28 for 82 YARDS! The Cardinals had 77 total yards of offense, fewest in NFL playoff history. That will never be topped unless Stanton gets a start in the playoffs.

(P.S. With Drew Stanton starting this week, that means there will be three Michigan State alums starting at quarterback in Week 5 with Kirk Cousins and Brian Hoyer being the other two. Just one of those random, trivial facts that is just kind of weird).

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About Author

Divac is the Editor-In Chief of The Schmozone and founder of Leaveit2divac.com. He is a fantasy sports maniac with terrible gambling habits and has a strange, irrational obsession with everything that is NBA legend Vlade Divac. Divac will be posting his outrageous commentary on daily sports topics in "The Daily Flop" section and one day dreams of being re-born as a mediocre Eastern European NBA journeyman.